Essays
Hope is shaped like a shovel and will give you blisters
More than once I felt like kneeling down. There’s a kind of awe that hits you when you understand the scale of the loss and the commitment required to heal and recover.
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The rapture of Survival: A collage of post-Waitangi mundane delights
Lois realises in her list of delights, there are no mundane tasks. Is she lazy? Possibly. Probably. She is surrounded by people who excel at the domestic. Lois prefers to document the domestic.
Essays
Post-script: Responding to the comments....
This is my wero and karanga back to you e te tuahine. What about that initial vision you talked to me about? Do you remember?
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I don't want to write about it but. (Why I'm leaving Substack.)
When my puku is churning it usually means I have to.
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Instructions for (not) Letting Go
A weird and short parable.
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An editor lives in my head
Years ago, Lois used to argue with John in actual cafes. They would meet and he would have a long black and her and oat milk flattie. Sometimes they ate (him lasagne with side salad, her a scone which she'd barely touch).
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What would happen if you were truly free?
"To get to a place where you could love anything you chose — not to need permission for desire — well now, that was freedom." - Toni Morrison
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The work of the witness: Reflections on a brilliant essay by Sarah Aziza
I think we all instinctively know that the ethics of witnessing on social media is barbed, but I suspect a lot of us don't talk about it because there isn't an easy language for it.
Essays
Returning to Omelas
The ones who walk away in Le Guin’s 1973 dystopian short story are those who refuse to accept that the price of their own freedom is the denial and violent suppression of someone else’s. But walk away to do what? To go where?
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Conversations at the dinner party (W.W.L.)
For the first couple of hours, the conversation flowed easily. It wasn’t the awkward Pākehā BBQ Lois had been expecting.
Essays
My kid got married and I gave a speech.
In preparation for my son's wedding two weeks ago, I canvassed a bunch of friends for advice on the hallmarks of a good wedding speech. Here's what they said.
Essays
Leaving is always about finding
Wednesdays with Lois (Hat tip to Renee's WednesdayBusk - with a single recommended busk from her archive, here). 4 min read. Summer, 2017. Lois has not long met the man she will swear isn't the reason. They're on the Blue Bridge Ferry heading south,